September 25, 2020

Money, Money, Money!

Money makes the world go round! Or at least that’s what we’re expected to believe…

I have a relationship of indifference towards money. On one hand I understand it’s needed to survive, and I do take joy in the occasional purchase of something recreational. However, on the other hand I truly dislike how money-eccentric a lot of people have become, to where it can consume their entire focus.

I’m not just talking about extreme cases either. Relationships have ended, friendships have been torn asunder, parents or spouses have lashed out at loved ones due to financial stress. You hear the horror stories all the time. This person left me because I lost my job, or I’m no longer talking to said individual because they owe me $200 and haven’t paid me back.

Some people even base the quality and importance of relationships on how much they’ve invested financially. Becoming angered with the person when things go awry, or staying in a relationship longer than is healthy because they’ve become financially co-dependant. The more frightening aspect, people will often avoid potential relationships altogether because they don’t feel the other individual makes enough money, or has the potential to.

I don’t understand it.

My father is someone like this, even though he has never seriously suffered financially during my lifetime, all he can see with every choice or situation are dollar signs. They impact him emotionally and nonsensically.

People existed before money, thrived even. The bartering system, while impractical now, displayed a remarkable ability for communities to work in unison. Now, if a fortune-500 hundred company doesn’t make a 7.3% profit by the third quarter (an amount of money needed by no one at the top might I add), then dozens to hundreds of employees are released from employment.

It’s not right, and honestly ridiculous. How much stuff do you need to buy, how big does your house have to be before you’re satisfied and can find happiness within yourself? Money does help, no one can ever argue that. But for a lot of people making and/or spending money has become a hobby; a force of interest in their life so intense it’s the only way they derive pleasure.

Obviously, regardless of my thoughts we can’t do away with money altogether, our population has grown too large and worldly for a barter system to be implemented; plus it is fun to go shopping on occasion. But that doesn’t mean the drive for money needs to become so great it destroys everything around you, including those you hold dear. I also fail to understand how being financially stressed translates to abusing others, but I’ll save such confusion for another post.

When it comes to lending people money, I was given a concept a long time ago by someone close. They said “I never lend money in hopes of getting it back, it’s a recipe for disaster. If someone is in need and you have the money to give, then give it to them. If they give it back down the road, wonderful, if not, who cares, because you considered it a gift to begin with”.

I love this way of thinking.

Unfortunately when it comes to the reality, I often wonder if people have forgotten that when someone reaches the point of needing to ask for money, it means they have already hit rock bottom. The amount of guilt and shame carried when someone asks for help, especially if they are prideful, are monumental. It usually means they have exhausted all possible options and are coming to you in their weakest moments. Yet in such an instance soaked with vulnerability, if your concern is whether or not you will get the money back as opposed to their well being…

I truly hope most are different.

But my point, if you are still following, is I think many could benefit from a little perspective when it comes to valuing a bunch of paper deemed important. That maybe, we work things out with our hearts first and our wallets second. At the very least, don’t ever let a silly thing like a stressful financial situation end something potentially wonderful.

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